Wednesday, 23 October 2019

The Back-Burner

   Unfortunately, it's that time of year again, when I set my writing aside for Etsy. I made the decision more tactically this time around, however, and decided to put my book on the back-burner at an opportune moment in the story rather than when I simply can't spare the time to write and handle Etsy orders. It does feel a little premature because, if I'm honest, my shop is not moving at all right now, but I feel happier putting it aside on my own terms, and I have other projects I want to do before November gets here which this will give me the time to do.
   I've been given another tarot story which I'd like to get done before November 1st, or by November 11th at the latest. I'll be away for the first week of the month, so I can use downtime then to get it done if need be.
   I'd also like to write a seasonal short story, too, and I'd like to get a drawing done for it before I leave, and then the story itself can be poked at through November/into December.
   I also have some book art I really want to get done before December. My eyes are too weak to stare intensely at a screen drawing and then move on to writing, it's too much, so I decided to do what should hopefully only be a week's worth of work over three weeks instead, and use my writing time for that. With any luck, it'll be done by December.

   So I have a lot of things I can do with my time while waiting for sales to kick off. Assuming, of course, that they do.
   I confess that this has been the worst year I've ever had on Etsy, and with a massive financial earthquake earlier in the year, this has been the toughest I've ever experienced and it's brought me to tears more often than I'd like to admit. The only thing that's kept me sane has been the improvement I've seen in distribution of and response to The Zi'veyn. But that, unfortunately, barely covers a cup of coffee every month. Fortunately I don't drink coffee, so those pennies go into my savings, but all the same, it barely makes a dent.
   I've been in a pretty poor mood about it all lately, to the point of even dreaming about money problems. But I guess that's part of being an adult. I don't like to complain about it because I know others are in worse positions, but sometimes - like this morning on twitter - it just sort of comes out. Fortunately in a small, quickly-staunched trickle, but I'm ashamed of it all the same.
   Running a business all by yourself, while being a full-time carer and trying to start a writing career (which itself is an even longer, slower process, both in actually creating a single product and then convincing people it's worth their time), well, it's tricky, and even for someone with as sturdy a mindset as me, things can easily weigh. I have a lot of straw on my back - lots of it, admittedly, put there by myself - and it doesn't take much to break it.

   Either way, I'm doing all I can, and I also admit that I have been enjoying working on new pieces, but I'm also glad I'm almost done. My husband and I are going to The Netherlands next month - staying with his parents and seeing friends and family, so it's a cheap get-away, at least - and I'm looking forward to that week away from work and exercise. I'm seriously starting to feel worn down, but I'm also incapable of taking time off of anything without a good excuse (a good excuse in this case being there are no weights available to use).

   I promise my next post will be more cheerful!



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