5 Weird Things About Me

   I saw Habitual Homebody do a post along these lines and I thought I'd try it too!

1. I really hate and am a little afraid of stairs.

   This isn't a phobia, it's not that extreme. I don't avoid steps. I always, always choose to take the stairs rather than an elevator or escalator, even in an airport or train station, unless I am simply carrying far too much, I've injured my leg, or I've been walking for a very long time, simply because it's that little bit healthier.

   But I absolutely hate them. I think it started in my great gran's house. Her stairs are not very wide, and not very deep, and the staircase seems so steep. I always wondered how the old woman managed it when I was a child, because I struggled even with baby feet! I'm the same in anyone's house, especially my boyfriend's parents' house in the Netherlands, because their stupid staircase has a 180 turn in it. I HATE IT. His cats come bouncing past, overtaking me, and I'm taking it slow grabbing onto anything I can, sticking to the outside where the steps are widest, and I always make a point of being the last one down, partly so I don't hold anyone up, and partly for a softer landing.

   I am especially wary if the steps don't have backs, and are more like shelves. I hold onto the hand rails for dear life, and if they're spiral, I will try to find another way up, or simply stay on the level I am on.

   I've been in many different castles, too, I love them, and I've visited a few with Seeg's family, but when we near the top, I feel the anxiety building up, and I often have to stop off in a lower level while the rest of them go up. I refuse to go with them, as much as I'd like to, because castle steps tend to be quite worn and made of stone (imagine slipping and hitting your head on the corner of that!) , and I am very clumsy. But I won't stop them from going. Seeg usually goes, but he's always the first back to me and is only gone for a few minutes, then we wait another 5-10 for his parents and then proceed right back down.

   The only steps I am comfortable with are my own, and they're also the only stairs I won't hold onto the railings while ascending or descending. I trust them, but also because they're carpeted.

2. I have a range of facial twitching habits.

   I've had them all my life and I continue to develop new ones. My latest involve raising and lowering my eyebrows as high and low as I can from a look of surprise to a look of sheer contempt. I can't help it, and I don't know why I do it. Another is twitching the sides of my nose up and down. Another is moving my ears back and forth. I have others but I don't want people to think I'm a complete lunatic. Vaguely insane is fine.

3. I talk to myself.

   All the time. Quite literally. I won't ask myself questions and then answer them as if I am 2 people, instead I talk as if I'm updating someone no one can see about what's going on with me, things I've just done, things I just found out, ideas I've had and things I plan to do. I can't stop it. It's always been this way. I was lonely as a child in school, I had few friends, and most of the time they were off with other friends, leaving me to stroll around the playground alone and talking to myself. It's sad when I think back, but in truth I never noticed it at the time and I was really quite happy, and that's totally what counts.

   Seeg has learned that I do this, however, and will often sit outside the room and listen to me, or just barge in going "whisperwhisperwhisperblahblahblah" and it embarrasses the hell out of me to be caught, but I cannot stop it, and neither do I really want to. It helps me think, and if I've written myself into a corner with my book, I can unstick myself in a matter of minutes by talking it out to myself. It also calms me down when I'm PMSing.

4. I love games but rarely ever play them.

   I've never played Assassin's Creed. I've watched Seeg play them all, however, and he's not allowed to play them without me there because I don't want to miss a bit of the story. My hand-eye co-ordination is attrocious so I'm really quite bad at games that aren't Skyrim or World of Warcraft, and my patience is very low so I don't like having to redo the same level 100 times because of silly mistakes, but just because I don't play most of them doesn't mean I can't appreciate their stories, or the benefits of actually playing the games. I plan to play Assassin's Creed myself because the stories are simply incredible, truly. We recently finished Assassin's Creed 4, and it has to be the most depressing of them all so far, but it makes a lot of sense. The end is particularly sad, but that's partly because I read Forsaken and I know what happens to Edward Kenway shortly after the very final scene in the credits. I was crying for about 10-15 minutes after it finished. It was a truly amazing story. Most of Assassin's Creed is historically accurate, with characters like the Borgia family, or Mary Read, but there are, obviously, a few fantastical features such as the existance of Assassins and Templars, the First Civilisation, artifacts and so on. But you would be surprised how much of what you witness in game is historically accurate.

   I have managed to play Halo: Reach, though it was co-op campaign with Seeg, but I held my own periodically when I told him to let me have a proper go. I also played Mass Effect 1&2 (not 3 yet because I'm a bit apprehensive about having to directly fight the Reapers), and that really was by myself with no help, and I survived the Arrival DLC and got an achievement because I didn't die at a certain point when I was expected to. Seeg did not get that achievement.

   Skyrim, World of Warcraft, Pokemon, these games are easy and pose no challenge, which is why I can play them so much and so often, but the others are more demanding and I find them difficult. But I don't play games to shoot people or to occupy myself like some people do, I watch and play games for the story, and I hope dearly that, one day, I might have a hand in developing the story of a game.

5. I rarely give to charities that ask me for it.

   If there's a charity that has an advert that runs for 1-2 minutes every commercial break (looking at you, Water Aid!), and ask for a measly amount like £2 a month, I will not give it to them. Seriously, some charities promote themselves so much that I wonder how much of that £2 or £3 a month goes to the cause and how much goes to advertising or profit - charities, by definition, should not be making a profit. On one hand, yes, advertising is how they can spread awareness of their existance and the problem they're trying to fight, but I really can't see the need to play their advert every 15 minutes. If they ran their adverts a lot less, and didn't send out bloody spam mail in the post now as well, then their cause may be further along than it is.

   I also won't sponsor a single type of animal from WWF. I will donate to the WWF, however, but I don't like to donate to just one animal. What people don't realise is that these "sponsor an animal" things, while nice to have, are a bit unfair, and as a result, either some animals (note the sellable, cute and cuddly ones) get more attention on their endangered status than less attractive animals such as the Western Black Rhino (now extinct) or other even lesser noticed animals. Or, the money you think is going to your sponsored animals will be going to Iguanas or frogs.

   I think all animals have the right to exist and be saved, even assholes like Orcas, and while I do understand the marketing logic behind offering sponsorships of leopards and elephants, it doesn't spread the awareness for other creatures that it should

   I choose my charities carefully, and it's the unsung charities like the MS Society that doesn't have any adverts whatsoever that get my money, because MS almost directly affects my life (almost directly because, to my knowledge, I don't have it, but my mum does). And I think very, very little of charities that make profit or create 2 minute long, slow motion guilt-tripping adverts that play every 15 minutes.